What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? Nagger

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops