An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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why was the kid laying in the middle of the baseball field? he was shot in the face then mauled by a bear.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

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Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

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If Michelle rides her bike at 15 mph for 20 minutes and Erik rides his bike at 20 mph for 12 minutes, why is Michelle not in the kitchen?

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

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How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

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A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

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Why are there so many blacks in prison? *The rest of this joke has been removed to avoid causing offence*

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What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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kk

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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knock knock come in !

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Q: What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? A: Not struggling with a debilitating mental or physical handicap.

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How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

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Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

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What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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