A apple a day keeps gramar away.

A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia......

Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

A guy said a racist joke and he got beat up now he is in the hospital for what he said.

Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

my penis

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know what? SCREW YOU!

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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