What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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Why did the woman have no boobs? Breast cancer

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Potassium? K.

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops