Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

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Q: What did the crippled deaf kid get for Christmas? A: A motorised wheelchair and a cochlear implant. Good for him.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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Q: You know why the floor is so clean? A: Because the janitor puts a lot of hard work into it.

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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your momma so stupid she dropped out of high school

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How did the little boy die? A speeding moving truck took a sharp turn, the locks on the doors broke open and a huge office desk flew out and crushed the boy.

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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your life

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So this guy was making a sandwich...

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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What is the name of the mermaid on the Starbucks logo? No one knows, she ran away many years ago of shame. It's undiscovered why.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops