What did the man say to the cat? Nothing it had his tongue

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

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What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

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What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

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In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

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dylan wishes he could come up with funny jokes. but that is impossible for a man trying to bat with a .5inch ****

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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Apple hates Blackberry.

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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you pick up 10 students from a school, you buy a pish from the fet store, and then drive to new york whos driving the bus? a fat guy with a level 80 org in world of warcraft

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How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

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What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

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An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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