what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's orange and sticky? An orange. What's red and sticky? My stool - is that normal?

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

What did John look at when Meghan Fox took off her shirt? her undershirt

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

Hey do you know who is in the yard? Not the boys, they all died in a horrific fire last Christmas.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

How do you like them apples I dont like aplles

What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

Last words of a redneck - "Hold my beer and watch this"

What is 9+10? 19

How do you know when your sister's on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood

W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

whats black and hangs from my tree a plum

A man sees the most beautiful woman he's ever seen on the street. He takes her into a dark alley and r.apes her.

Who is Dank? A: Billal

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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