Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ruh-ruh-blah-blah-bluh

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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Why did the blonde go to the post office? Because she received a phone call from them indicating that there was a package for her.

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What is pink and gets wet a tounge

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why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

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Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

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So this guy was making a sandwich...

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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The child was fired from his job.

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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Who is big and stupid My brother

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What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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Q) A Christian, slightly disabled but perfectly capable man has a packet of Jaffa Cakes. He strolls casually toward the edge of a cliff, rapidly checking his watch. The man slowly examins the packet before gradually opening the packaging. First the box, then the packet. He quickly throws the jaffa cakes over the edge of the cliff, Why? A) The man doesnt like jaffa cakes

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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What were the murderer's last words before he was put to death by electric chair? "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NNNNNFHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.................................................................................................................." He then defecated in his pants.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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