A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

Dwarf Shortage

why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

What do you call a deer with one eye? Nothing. The deer was transported to a specialist animal hospital and now has two working eyes, eliminating the purpose of this joke. We apologise for wasting your time.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

Q: Why God never got a PhD? A: 1. He had only one major publication. 2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English. 3. It has no references. 4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal. 5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself. 6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then? 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited. 8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results. 9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing. 10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his subjects. 11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample. 12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book. 13. Some say he had his son to teach the class. 14. He expelled his first two students for learning. 15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests. 16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

hi hey i hate you why you ate my mother she tasted good i like fried chicken ITS A SMALL WORLD! SO DO I well lets go to the beach ok

Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

Two Iranian men walk into a bar and order a Coke and a Lemonade. The Barman said take a seat and he'll bring them over.

what would happen if every overweight person in america jumped at the same time? they would all get a little exercise.

How do you kill a clown? You smash his face into a brick.

Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

whats worse than catching your parents having sex? having sex with your parents

Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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