What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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Q: What's the difference between Rush Limbaugh and the Hindenburg? A: One is a huge, flaming, Nazi gasbag, and the other is a drug-addicted talkshow host.

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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When Hitler was a girl she had hyjenical warts and when she got older she had beast cancer.

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Knock Knock The guy opens the door

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Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

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Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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