What does Chuck Norris order at a coffee shop? Coffee.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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In 2030, what will most people be doing for a living? Using food stamps.

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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