What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

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Refridgerator.

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MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

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What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

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What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

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A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

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What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

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What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

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Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

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whats the same between a mouse and an elephant? They are both small except for the elephant

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His mother was a prostitute.

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What do you call a black man in church? Religious

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Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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Why'd the bird in Ohio fall out of its nest? There was a squirrel that was eaten by a large eagle. The eagle then flew to Ohio and died. Then, a large dog grabbed the Eagles corpse and brought it to his owner. The owner then decided to have it for dinner. Inside the eagle, he found the squirrels bones. He put the bones in a catapult, and sent them flying. The bones hit a car and the car slipped off the road and into a river. Then, a whale put the car on its back and swam to the shore. At the shore, the whale got stranded and sadly died. Crabs surrounded the whale and ate it. One crab then ran away and up a tree. It found a stapler and a rubber dinosaur mask and gave it to a chipmunk. The chipmunk climbed up the tree, stapled nuts into the birds eyes and stapled the rubber dinosaur mask to its face, the bird got scared, and then all of the sudden the chipmunk stapled itself to the birds back. The birds family then came and shoved the two out of the tree because they hated chipmunks, and their son Timmy the bird was a disappointment. The bird and the chipmunk fell and died. That is why the bird fell.

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Why do they call Jean a redneck? Because her neck was red from being in the sun for so long.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops