why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

What do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? A surgeon.

Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

Non-Anti-Joke.com!

What was the fly doing in the soup? Nothing, the guy ordered pizza.

Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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