What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

pudding

Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

How far can a baby fly? As far as you can throw it.

What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

Potassium? K.

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

whats the difference between samios and a dog? Nothing.

A Polish man walks into a bar and says, "Co za asy..."

Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

What do you call a Puerto Rican, a Blonde, and an African woman in a taxi cab? Three people who happen to be traveling to the same location at the same point in time.

Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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