Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

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Why couldn't the girl talk... she chocked to death -Alan Davis

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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This Irishman walked into a pub and then drank hard liquor for the next 3 hours.

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your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

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Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

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How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

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What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

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I have cancer. And you're next.

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- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he is quite wealthy.

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Did the Jewish surgeon charge extra for circumcisions? Nope, he just kept the tips

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this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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The FCC

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What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Why does Jimmy Neutron have a big head? Heredity.

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Hi I'm Ben What's your name? I forgot. Hi "I forgot" what's your name? Ben

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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