How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

kennah campion when she talks

what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

What do you call two black men walking down a stairwell? Their names.

Why did the Jews go into the shower? Because they had just finish a basketball game and they needed to freshen up.

What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

Fat? Jesse Z

Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

How many cats would it take to change a lightbulb? Cats can't change lightbulbs

Knock Knock? Who's there? Doctor Doctor Who? It is a science fiction show about a time traveller

How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...