A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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I'm so punny.

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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Hello

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What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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Q:Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because he lost all of his tongue due to the chemicals of cigarettes.

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a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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If you can fit many clowns in a car and many mexicans in a car...how many mexican clowns will fit?

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Q Why did the feminist cross the road? A To suck my dick

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Q: a black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? A: The mexican. They're going to the bookstore to get some books.

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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Q: Why do only 10% of women go to heaven? Your question is fundamentally wrong. Religion is a collective hallucination.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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