A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

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full house should of been called black jack, because the Olsen twins started getting hit on at age 8 and didn't stop til they were 21

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

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men, men like men= men+bed

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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what is black and white and read all over? a bankrupt newspaper that cannot afford color ink because the accountant misplaced company funds.

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

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what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

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A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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interviewer: young man, do you think you can handle a variety of work? Young man: I ought to be able to. I’ve had 12 different jobs in 4 months.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

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I was having sex with thisgirl and now I'm going to be a dad. All because I didn't wear a condom

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What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

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A man walks into his room with a DVD and a box of kleenex. The DVD is a wedding video of his now dead wife.

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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