Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

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Dwight Howard

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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A black man walks out of a police station

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

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Hey Bill, did you know we have a black guy in our family tree? Really? Yeah, he's still hanging there

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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Why was the man like a chimp? Because they are 96% genetically identical.

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What page are you on The gay page.

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Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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Q: knok knok A: Im home

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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How man people does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1 an electrician

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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