Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

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How does a black man laugh? He schuckles

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A professor of literature asked me, "Young Sir, why are you burning those books?" I replied, "Because I need a fire to cremate the bones of your 3 sisters that I violently raped and murdered" He smirked in a witty and arrogant fashion, until raising his head and saying, "Bond, James Bond" He continued to massage his dick with his own pubic hairs before collapsing and dying

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A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

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A father and his son get into an accident and are whisked away to the hospital. The father dies, and the son is brought into surgery. The doctor is rushed in, but looks at the boy and says "I can operate on this boy, his my son." How is this possible? The boy's father was a zombie.

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

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What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

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What is the answer to this joke? Cuz fuck you that's why.

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Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

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roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

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what did the nail say to the hammer? Hit me baby one more time

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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Q. How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A. That obviously depends on the size of the bathtub and each individual infant.

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why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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