What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

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Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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What's worse than having a mouth full of molars? A pole through your chest.

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My aunt always said slow and steady wins the race She died in a fire

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because his hands were amputated.

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—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

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What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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knock knock Who's there? Will Nealis Will Nealis who? Will nealis continuously finds himself crying himself to sleep as reality begins to smack himn in the face revealing to him that nobody has, does, or ever will like him. He is also informed that the reason his parents left him is because he is such a flaming ginger, his nasty face ruins the atmosphere of any room he walks in to. he has been adopted by a lovely gay couple and he takes after both of his fathers very much, in the aspect of enjoying massive animal c o c k in his mouth as well as having threesomes with his dads. will goes to school everyday and is tormented for being homosexual, so when he goes home hie parents beat him....off and have lemon partys with wills grandpa as he watches and masturbates vigourously.

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whats the difference between an iron and a priest? An iron is a hand-held device which presses clothes and a priest is a person who is authorized to perform the sacred rituals of a religion.

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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How many people with Alzheimer's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his whole family died in a plane crash.

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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Why did Susan fall off the swing? -Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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