Knock knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your stupid.

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What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

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how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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Q. Why did the little girl drop her ice cream? A. She dropped it as she got into the van

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What is black and blue and doesn't like sex? The 6 year old in my basement.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

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Why did the jew kill himself? He heard a raciest joke and went into a period of depresion causing him to lose all will to live.

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Mom says my name I reply Coming.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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So i was writing a letter to my girlfriend on valentines day right ? So this is how it goes . " hey lisa happy volentines day!" my black friend walks up to me and says" its a mightyfine day out! " The moral of the story is... Tomatoes can't fly planes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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