there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Children Protective Services. Your kids are dead.

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Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

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A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

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Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

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Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

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what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

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why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

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Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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Paris Hilton spend 2 whole days in the slammer due to possesion of narcotics. I would have gotten 20 to life... no... it's not funny...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

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Your mama is so black, she contributes regularly to the NAACP and the United Negro College Fund. Her donations and volunteer work help greatly.

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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