Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the 2nd monkey fall out if the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, Monkey do.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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how much fish could a chicken

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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Knock Knock. Not home.

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You know what is funnier than 24???? I don't know that's why I was asking

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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Why did the White man scream when he saw a Black man? Because he was scared.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,All you HATERS of J. Bieber, Go suck your MOTHER.

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You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

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Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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What happens when a baby stops crying? it dies.

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What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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