Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

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my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

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An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

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How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

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What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

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I'm rick james bitch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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