If life hands you lemons Take them

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A straight-A star quarterback was about to throw the game-winning pass during the final game of his school's season. If he got this pass their undefeated record would have been completed for the last 50 years. Before he threw the pass, he was sacked by a defender. He fell incorrectly and broke both of his legs, rendering all of his scholarships invalid. He hasn't walked since.

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Why don't blind people skydive? They do.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

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What do you get when you multiply a trillion times a billion times a quintillion? A huge ass number.

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: I don't know, he didn't tell me.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his donkey? "Oh no, my donkey is my livelihood and the only means I have of supporting my family. Now, we shall surely starve."

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" I can't here you it's too dark!"

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

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You.

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A man walks into a bar every night. He works there.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

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Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

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Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

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hi my name is? joe

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Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they are not, they are purple. Whoever the uneducated idiot was who made up that poem deserves nothing more then a slap in the face

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So one time this woman was learning...

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Roses are shit Violets are my dick Guess what I do for a living? Sex with refrigerator monkeys!

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When is the right time to have sex with a 16 year old? After consent from her parents

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how did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken..

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whats the diffference between pizza and a jew? burning a pizza makes me sad, burning a jew is worthy of a party!

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Why did little Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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why did the man die? he got shot

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how do you get a blue waffle? paint your vagina blue

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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