A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

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YO MAMA'S SO , A STUPID, THAT SHE PUT 2 QUARTERS IN HER EARS AND THOUGHT THAT SHE WAS LISTENING TO FIFTY-CENT!!!

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

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wwwwwhhhurjfjfiudkdhdhkrjfhfjhptghxusudgfhfdhydsyartsdyufhftsysduifogfiiffiydyycufkdytgysyseyydyyduudduydfefikdkeejdicttsysieoowowugagshxjkcjdjevwgyeixodlbbsgwdfehidigofojrehnfkcocoeppwiwufvvdjxifooejehedicisgeneifofjrjhehdhxirjvhejfjhrbrhjfbducjebkwpqosbhdhsvddhehueuwowpqpfugtbcihebdhdjgeyqiichhesweysyhy vhhhhhshdjfjhehehehehehuijrhfeds???????????????????????????????)GHJDJDJFKHRHDJDIEHDJKCHEEJFcyfjfjudffyewdjhsafvd

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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did you hear about the fly on the toilet? i heard he got pissed off!

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Why the West African Rhino is extinct? They were never Horny

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A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

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A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

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Knock Knock. In about 10 seconds you'll be trespassing on my property, I suggest you leave immediately. Your suppose to say who's there.

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What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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A man tells a blonde "you are what you eat" and she replies "well, i don't think I've eaten any sexy beasts today.'

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Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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