A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

A black man walks out of a store. He was carrying a receipt.

1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

I'm called the! no i wish am I left

What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

why are you going to laugh at this its reallly dumb

I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

A dog got into a gingerbread house. She ate some and brought some to the basement it got on the couch!

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

If life gives you lemonade.

What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat low calorie foods because she wants to lose weight.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead... Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey... Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game...

Allah walked into AK Bar

What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

Q. What has two legs and is covered in red stuff? A. Half a dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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