Two guys walk into a bar, but the third guy is a duck.

Boy: Are you from Tennessee? Because you're accent sure sounds like it.

A man walks out of a bar. Gets in his car and crashes because drunk driving isn't safe.

A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

my boloney has a first name its OSCAR, my boloney has a last name its MEYER.. now bend over son while i shove my boloney in ur butt!

Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

What do you get when you cross a chicken and a dinosaur? You can't. Dinosaurs are extinct.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

tea with milk?

Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

What do bluejays and cardinals have in common? They both Were born during the Medevil period.

If you are reading this you are a nerd

When life gives you lemons, you go to a therapist and seek help because your dementia has progressed to the point that you are seeing and feeling illusions.

A man walks into a bar He wakes up from his coma 21 years later and learns that humans now serve pumpkins as gods.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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