what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

wat do u call a person who is ugly ugly

How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

"Never trust what the internet says." - Abraham Lincoln

What do you call a cup that holds liquid A cup

How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Steve" "Oh hey Steve, come on in"

Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

My captcha thing says "hulk smash" lol bahahahahahahaha, k

Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

why did the man move away from me because he thought that i had crabs as pets

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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