What's the difference between a leopard and a coffee table? There is no difference. They both have four legs.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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Do you know what the worst part about inbreeding is? - It's runs in the family!

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

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Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple, not fucking blue.

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A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

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What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

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How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

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Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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Knock Knock whose there your parents your parents who your parents just got malled by a hobo with an axe.

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Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops