What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

Q:Why are dinosaurs extinct? A:Well there are two reasons the first being a giant meteor struck the earth killing all the dinosaurs. The other reason you touch yourself at night.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

What's fatter than your mum? Your mum's mum

Beached whale: "Look at me, I'm a land mammal"

Seriosly. too much sex again?

There's two muffins in an oven, the first muffin says "Woah, it's really hot in here!". The second muffin says "Oh my God! A talking muffin!"

'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

What did the blonde order in the restaurant? A cup of coffee.

what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

Knock knock. Who's there? Mom. Mom who? SHUT THE F**K UP AND OPEN THE DOOR!!!

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

your mamma so dumb she makes frankienstien look smart

Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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