A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

Why did the teenager take a shower? Because she was brutally raped by a serial rapist and felt dirty. Unfortunately for her, she was unaware that she was washing off the prints from her body and the rapist was never found

I LOVE MASTURBAITING ALL DAY!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

A man walks into a bar he said oww when did this metel bar get here

Why does Apple hate Blackberry? They don't fruit can be rivals.

hey hey hey wanna hear a joke.....................................MENS IQ!!!!!!

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

What's green and says I'm a frog? A talking frog

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

What's worse than homework? A basket full of mutilated puppies....

Roses are red Violets are blue Not all poems rhyme Penis

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

Face...the other white meat!

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????1?2?3?4?5?6?7?8?9?0?????????#????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????©®™?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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