how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

An iguana walks out of a bar

A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

Roses are flowers jordan does it for hours xxxxif ya know what i mean

What do you call a black Jew that is also a crippled midget with no family except for an autistic brother? His original name that his mother gave him at birth.

A blond is stranded on a desert island when she finds a magic lamp. Except it's actually a rock and she is hallucinating due to dehydration and starvation.

An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

roses are black violets are gray im color blind

No.

What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is too sparsely populated and not economically viable.

does your face hurt? yeah, neither does mine.

Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

Why did suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Whos there NOT SUZY!

He do you get an emo kid to stop cutting himself? Take away his knife.

Rick Perry.

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

I have a left shoe. I have a right shoe. I have two feet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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