Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

What's red and can sing? Elmo

What's a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

What are annoying? Ads.

Knock knock Who's there? Dishes Dishes who? Dishes a bad joke

Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

black people

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

Why did the old man die? He was old.

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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