4501 3346 1687 2292 david0209. never do this.

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

Dont be racist be like mario he is an italian who looks like a mexican speaks english and picks up coins like a jew.

69

Why did the 60 y/o man take erectile dysfunction pills? His doctor prescribed them.

Why did all the boys come to my yard? Because of My milkshakes

-Knock Knock? -Who's There? -David Baxter. -David Baxter Who? -Wha- What? What do you mean "David Baxter who?" We were best friends in high school. YOU WERE THE BEST MAN AT MY WEDDING!! *David Baxter proceeds to cry, as he doesn't know of his dear friend's Alzheimer's disease*

The american education system.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? When they were tossing frisbee and accidentally tossed it into their neighbors yard and they had to go get it.

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

How do you kill a dumb blonde? Stab them in the chest 43 times.

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...