If you have 12 apples and I have 12 ice cubes how many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

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Why did the pencil break? A Viking destroyed it with his beard.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

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What did i say to the stupid person? Your Stupid.

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

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You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

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Q: What's worse than a black guy with a gun? A: the holocaust

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What's the difference between a black preist and a white priest? the color of their skin.

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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Jesus hates you this I know, because Buddha told me soo.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

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What looks red and smells like barf? Depends on how you look at the situation.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

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An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are eating lunch on a bridge. The Mexican drops his taco off the side of the bridge and the Italian and American were kind enough to share some of their lunch with the Mexican making it a successful picnic. Their ethnicity was not relevent at all.

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What do you call a boy with one eye and no arms. -Mean names.

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What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer...and the other is a watermelon.

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How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

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Two friends are arguing over who is the best pie maker. '' I've made pumpkin, apple, peach, cherry, blueberry, and sweet potato!" " Yeah well I've made all of those AND pecan!'' ''Yeah well have you ever made boysenberry pie?!" "No! What the hell!" *in a calm tone* " Yeah, me neither."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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