Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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how much did the asian man pay for his operation? nothing. he's dead.

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ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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Jingle bells Batman smells WHERE IS SHE??!!?!?!?

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A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

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why did the Jew not attend school ? because he was 27

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

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Wanna hear a joke??... No...... oh ok :(

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my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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A black, white, Asian, and Mexican are walking down the street. This is showing a good diverse community.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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