Why was 13 afraid of 27 Because 51 had an extra penis

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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What do you do when the Cubs win the world series? Turn the xbox off and go to bed.

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Who's gay? Justin Beaver

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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What's the most popular fruit in the U.S.? Bananas What's the most popular vegetable in the U.S.? Stephen Hawking

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Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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Man goes to the doctors, He waits patiently in the waiting room for nine minutes and is then called in to see the doctor for a routine check up. After seeing the doctor he picks up his sisters kid from school and carries on with his day.

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Knock knock Who's there? A Jehovahs Witness

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Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? because he was dead

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What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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Naturally us at the order of exile, the ones that learn and teach the ways of Nero do not exist. Soon neither will those that speak against us. - Azure Dragon

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Four black guys have a picnic. One of them pulls out a bag of KFC. Another pulls out some Kool Aid. The third pulls out a watermelon. The fourth pulls out a box of cookies you racist prick

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops