What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwing out all the W&Ws

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What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

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Why did the guy fall asleep? Because he's in a coma.

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I read the terms of service.

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your mom gave me head.....phones

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

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Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. This poem sucks. I like math!

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god."

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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I GOT YOUR BUTT PUSSY!

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When life gives you lemons, chuck them at someone's face!

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

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How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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