Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

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so....a guy is sitting on the couch looking out his living room window and a cab pulls up and honks..he says to himself, "wow that was quick, i just called for the cab 5 minutes ago!"

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How do you make someone sad? Tell them they have cancer

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I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

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You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

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Daniel is a fag

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What do porn stars do after they retire? No clue but some idiot made a movie about it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

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Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

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What does Yoko Ono say while rehearsing her song before a concert? She gives directions to the band.

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I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

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Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

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Why did Joe not cross the road? Because the Pedestrian Crossing light said not to.

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Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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So 2 black guys walk into a bar and the bartender looks around and say "what will you fine gentlemen have?" and they order and payed their tab and could not have been more courteous, amirite?

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Why was the black man afraid of leaving his house? Because he has severe agoraphobia and cannot function normally in society.

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what did the dead guy say to the boy? nothing he is dead.

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If you give a hobo a stick he might poke u with it

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what does wtf stand for? what? i was asking you!

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My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

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One more note for my children: ...My words appeal to your dark, evil side, it is that which might trigger your fear and disgust... But dont blame your fear on me you moron... ....To those that react with fear and disgust towards my comments: You know the fear and disgust in you, your own emotions make you feel fear and disgust for yourselves, because like all and everything that feels the inspiring words of the Black Angel... ...You know you like it ;) The friendly Black Angel/R*pist: God can free you from the temptation I inspired in your heart, but why would you? Now, thumb this comment down, so you can feel "good about yourself" and suffer in life in order to become a slave and serve the one that made you suffer troughout life... You think me, yet you fail to see that if it where me, I would have be Jehovah your GOD!... ...Worry not though, all of those that plan to stick alive for 10-15 years and I allow to live, will get to serve The Only God, your EMPEROR: Moral Man... Know my name and fear it, and yes mortal, you will also be screaming it...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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