How do you get a black man out of a tree? With a ladder.

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

THIS!!!!!!! IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SPARTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What do you get when you cross black man and a Hispanic woman A child that is a combination of both ethnic groups

Whats worse than losing your phone? Buying a new one and then losing that

Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

Why did the boys shout ZACHATTACK? Because zach was attacking

What's worse than finding out your husbands gay...........finding out he's gay with your brother"

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

Hey, you must be a parking ticket. Because you are on the windshield of my car.

A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

Why did Anakin tell Luke he was his father? Because honest people never lie

What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

A baby seal walks into a club. He immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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