the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

So these two guys walk into a bar... Well, I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mother a whore.

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

Whats Jewish and Funny? A Jewish Comedian.

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

i see trees are green, Roses are red, Violets are blue and i think to myself What a Wonderful World

I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

How do you make a Bong Ki mad? Call him a Bong Ki.

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

quantum physics?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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