- Anti Joke

a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

What do Jay Williams, Lebron James, Candace Parker and Maya Moore have in common? They were all winners of the Morgan Wootten Player of the Year Award.

Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

What do you call a deer with one eye? Injured.

21 Ways to Annoy Everybody 1) Pretend to be one of the Bush family. Doesn't matter which. 2) Have an uncontrollable lusting for someone else every five minutes. 3) Pretend to be from different ethnic backgrounds every hour, and when people ask you about it, answer like a hillbilly would. 4) Act like a hillbilly. Period. 5) Improvise Italian operas. 6) Gossip about someone to their face. 7) Answer every question with a question. 8) Repeat yourself constantly. 9) Act like a member of the opposite sex. 10) Repeat yourself constantly. 11) Act like Mr. Flanders from The Simpsons. 12) Repeat yourself constantly. 13) Change what you repeat every now and then. 14) Use homonyms in your e-male that the spell cheque would knot sea as miss steaks. 15) Change what you repeat every now and then. 16) Talk to someone while looking at somebody else. 17) Employ in your casual banter extensive vocabulary that will befuddle thy contemporaries. 18) Change what you repeat every now and then. 19) One word: Caffeine. 20) Another word or two: Caffeine and Sugar. 21) stringwhateveryousayintoonelongwordsoitshardtomakeoutwhatyou'resaying.

Pope: how to help the unfortunate people my fellow Christians? Christians: We should give donations and a lot of support. What we always do. Pope: and i shall wear this golden hat, sit on a high quality super expensive chair, this rope with gold attached to the decorations, and wave my golden staff as you help these poor innocent children. Christians: yes...that... Pope: P.S: and live in an expensive church with many children alone.

knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

Robert: wanna hear a joke? Robort:ok, shoot. Robert: BANG!

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

Knock knock Who’s there? The police, your family was killed in a horrific car crash on highway 22 this morning at 10:15 after they collided head on with a truck. They died instantly if it is any conciliation. We will contact you further into our investigation. Dave then poured himself a whiskey and thought about all the good times he and his family shared, teaching Jessica to ride a bike, his and Kate’s honeymoon in Honolulu, playing catch with Jacob. That’s when the full extremity of the situation hit Dave causing him to break into tears he sat and cried for three hours and fifteen minutes. Once he had gotten that out of his system he decided to visit his mother and tell her the horrible news. Knock Knock Who’s there? Dave Dave who? Again Dave breaks into tears as his grandmothers althsiemers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember her sons name. Feeling shattered he decides not to go through the process of explaining who he is and decides to head to the local pub to drown his sorrows. Bartender: hard day? Dave: my wife and two beautiful children were mauled in a head on collision with a truck and my mother can’t remember who I am. Bartender: yeah sure but was it a hard day? Dumbstruck with this ridiculous remark Dave pauses for a moment. The bar is silent only the sounds of bottles clinking and feet tapping on bar stools can be heard. Cigarette smoke hangs in the air. Dave stares at the bartender momentarily then throws his bottle at him send him off balance Dave then grabs the shot gun he knows the bartender keeps behind the counter and shoots the bartender at point blank range. Some customers run scared witless other try to control Dave but only end up in the same position as the bartender. Dave is left standing in a pool of blood. The smell of death hangs in the air with the cigarette smoke. Feeling slightly better Dave heads home and kills himself. Dave was an excellent plumber we will miss him.

What did Michael jackson say to Abraham Lincoln? Nothing, there are both currently deceased, if they did, however, say something to each other, it would not be in person, because they are both dead.

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

Why did Jenny cry? Because everyday Jenny is bullied. Jenny cried for this reason, but nothing happened. The bully still bullies her today.

Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

Why couldn't Billy eat his dinner? Because a black man amputated his hands.

How do Asians name their children? They throw them down the stairs and see what sound they make.

roses are red violets are blue porn hub is down your mums facebook will do

whos a sick fuck? jake morris

A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

A woman walked into a club. Or at least, that's what her abusive boyfriend told the police.

chinga tue madre Ryan

a man walked into a bar he had no recollection of entering the bar so he exited the bar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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