Three examples of how santa is gay 1) he says HO HO HO 2) he sneaks into your house at night from going down the chimney 3) he knows when u r sleeping and he knows when u r awake BONUS............. Better not pout, you better not cry, better watch out im telling u why.........SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was curious about something that had diverted his attention.

Roses are red, and violets are freakin violet. Not blue.

Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

Many men trespass on my property to taste my milk based beverages. They insist that it's quality is superior to yours. I could teach you how to make such milk based beverages, but I would have to levy a fee.

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

What long black and tasty? Licorice

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

An Asian person drove home safely.

What's worse than finding out your dad has AIDS? Finding out your little brother also has it, but you and your mother don't.

Your mums a potato

How do you stop an African outlaw who uses child soldiers? Angelina Jolie

What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

Whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bag? 1 dead baby in 10 bags

John has 7 apples and Lisa has 4 apples John eats 3 apples and Lisa eats 1 apple and give another to John Their diets lacks various essential nutrients

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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