Q: What did little Timmy get from his mother this Christmas? A: The contents of her will.

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How does Steven Hawkings refresh after a long day of work? F5

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nice tits.

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

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Read a Book.

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Skinny people fart less.

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what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

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What's black and blue and hates sex? A rape victim.

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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Why did the young boy fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome.

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why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Through forceful action.

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2

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Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

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What is 100(1+1) -100 + 50 x2 - 300? 0. But who cares? The answer is as worthless as you.

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Do you want to hear a joke? No.

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Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

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What do you call a jewish womans boobs? JUBES!

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A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops