Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Title IX

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What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

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A man attempts to rob a bank. The police are called and the robber is arrested for attempted robbery.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Door! He then broke down into tears as the nightmares from his schizophrenia had lead to a severely crippled mental state.

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A wild bear walks into a bar, grabs a drink and looks at the man next to it. The man then wakes up from a dream and gets ready for work.

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How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

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-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

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Q:how do confuse courtney A: give her a beer

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CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

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Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

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What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

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how do you boil oil? add b to oil

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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A blind man walks past a fish market then says "why hello lady's" ????

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I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

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:)Knock, Knock :(Who's there? :)Barbie :(Barbie who? :)Barbieq

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? rockband

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What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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