pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

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What is three times more dangerous than war? Three Wars.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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What happens if you roll a nickel down a street in Mexico? It eventually stops and lands on its side.

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A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

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jeanna:fu** jack:did u just say fu** jeanna:jew? jack:fu** u jew

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A black man has a job.

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what did the dog say to the retarded black guy ? bark

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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How many Terry Pratchetts does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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My girlfriend said she doesn't like anti jokes and now i'm single ha ha just kidding.... she's dead

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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There's a study that the population of Americans are very high in America.

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Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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