Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Why are pigs smelly ? Because a cucumber can't walk.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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