Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

A man is sitting on his couch. The lights go out and his TV begins to float away. He breaks down into tears believing he has been cursed for a crime he commited earlier.

What do you get if you cross a horse with a cow? A horse and a cow.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

Why does Apple hate Blackberry? They don't fruit can be rivals.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's dog? Neither has anyone else, because it ran away yesterday, and was most likely hit by a car.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Biting into an orange and finding Helen Kellar

What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

Roses Are Red , Violets Are Blue , Go Die .

Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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